I came from a fairly functional family, my parents had their issues and fights, but in the big picture my home life was stable. I over the years have teased my parents about some of the problems I have had in my life, and implied that they were to blame, though never really were. But they are responsible for some things I believe I have done right or at least I am attempting to do right.
- My parents showed a lot of affection towards one another as I grew-up. They hugged, they kissed, they walked down the street holding hands, my mom sat on my dad’s lap when they talked at times. I felt secure as a child because of this type of interaction. Their behavior then and even now has helped me in my marriage. Christina and I see my parents as a model of two people who though very different can work together through anything and at the end of each day be one another’s best friend! I believe I am a better husband and have a better marriage because of what my parents did right.
- My parents never shied away from saying, “SORRY”. I never remember a time that I was wronged by one of my parents where they were not quick to say sorry. If they yelled at us kids unnecessarily, or punished us to severly, they always said sorry. I learned from them that it is okay to admit when I am wrong, and sorry is a very easy word for me to use.
- My parents said I love you a lot! I was a kid that was very insecure and got into an abundance of trouble, I was the black sheep of a great family. I did most the things parents never want their kids to do, I never, ever felt I did anything that decreased their love! I believe their unconditional love, eventually helped me to accept God’s unconditional love!
- My parents taught me respect for authority. If any past teachers are reading this, they may disagree:) But though as a young person I showed very little respect to anyone, the lessons were still planted and I know this has allowed me to accept and value God’s Lordship, His authority over my life, even when I don’t always understand what He is doing!
- My parents did not fight my battles. I had to learn to be strong and understand that life isn’t fair, that people can be mean, and that my response to these situations is very important. I wonder whether kids are still learning this? It seems that parents are always quick to blame teachers or a kids peers, or another kids parents. Parents are quick to go in and fight their kids battles and I am afraid we will find as the years pass a progressively more immature, and a more delinquet society!
- My parents believed in character over talent. My dad and I had so many battles during my sports years. I remember us breaking down every single play following basketball and baseball games. We would fight on the golf course and at the batting cages, etc.. Here is the thing though, I never remember verbatim any of those confrontations (probably b/c they weren’t as bad as I’ve created in my head), but I do remember verbatim the time he caught me disrespecting a teammate, and the time he caught me giving a cheap shot to an opponent in a basketball game. My dad wanted me to win, he wanted me to play well, but more than that he wanted me to play with honor. I have tried to keep that in mind with every decision I make in life. The most important thing for me is to do things with honor!
I have great parents and these are just a few of the many things they did right for me and I am trying to do right for my boys.